Saltwater Crocodile (Crocodylus porosus).

Image via Wikipedia

Generally, I do not watch TV but if at all I watch then I am always hooked at Animal Planet. I like to have more information about animals. The way they live, their habitat, their adaptation to the surrounding and their behavior. It just amazes me and makes me feel the  ALL MIGHTY’s existence.

So the other day I was watching Animal planet and there was a show about 4 animals – Crocodile, White Shark, Eagles and Cheetah. The show was about these animals, their hunting skills, their power, tactics, stamina and habitat. All these animals have different and interesting story but I will concentrate on crocodile which instigated my thought process.

These are a special type of crocodile which are found in Africa. This African region gets lots of rain and faces the worst drought. During the rains, these crocodiles hunts on animals that come to quench their thirst. The crocodile accumulates enough fats which helps it to sustain the worst drought. At the advent of summer, the crocodile, goes deep into the ground to protect itself from the excruciating heat. Throughout the summer, the crocodile is dormant and in hibernation mode. The crocodile doesn’t move, doesn’t eat and relies solely on the fats it accumulated during the rains. It’s heart beats just twice in a minute, enough to supply oxygen to all its vital organs. At the end of summer, the crocodile have already conserved most of the fats and it needs to hunt to add up its fats reserves. This cycle continues until the crocodile dies.

The moment I saw this, I realized that the crocodile does nothing significant in its life span. It hunts, eats, hibernate again hunts and then the cycle continues. This made me realize that my life is not any better than this crocodile and thinking more on this makes me useless and insignificant.

Do I really want to spend my life like this???????


Never ever…….

Today, I learned an important lesson in my life. While giving advice to anyone about a situation you been through, always convey the universal thing or the most common solution instead of a better solution based on your experience.

For e.g. — I did my master’s in Computer Science from USC and till date I never recommended doing master’s to anyone. I feel it was a bad decision and I want that people around me should not do the same mistake I did. But from today, I am going to recommend everyone for Masters. It is because, this is what they want to listen and from today I am going to be a good person and not a bad one(I become bad by telling my true feelings and honest opinions.)

It took some time for me to understand this but finally I got it…..

I want to live a life like …….

I am impressed by my late grand father. His attitude, his desire, his ambition, his way of living his life, everything motivates me. I always looks towards him when I am dull or sluggish or disheartened or lack in confidence. He had an urge to fight with life, a passion to make something happen for himself and his descendants. I will explain some of his traits.

He was the most ambitious person I have ever seen. He always dream’t of achieving great heights even when he was 92. Even at 92, he use to plan of setting new industries, studying the market and doing analysis, discovering new businesses and doing all sorts of experiments and surveys. It doesn’t matter, what he was able to achieve but what matters is his way of keeping him busy and productive. He retired from life but not from work. He never asked my father or uncle for any money but he used to generate/earn his own and used to give a share to my grand mother. I am really blessed to be his grand son.

People often complain that they are not lucky or luck doesn’t favor them. I guess, the life of my grand father can easily explain the importance of luck in life. Guess what, Luck never favored him at least in business. Everything he tried never worked and he incurred heavy losses. But the best thing about him was, he never gave up. He continued to fight with his luck and never sat back whining on it. He never complained that he wasn’t lucky. He was never depressed that his plans never worked out. He just knew one thing, fight till the last breath and he just did that. Till the last breath, he fought with his luck and tried to turn things around. He is the best example of courage and determination for me. Whenever I am gloomy or disturbed, I just think about him and the way he struggled throughout his life. It instantaneously charges me and I am back in fighting mode.

He believed that his duty is not just towards his family but also towards his society. He wanted to improve the life of people around him and he tried to achieve that by not giving money but by showing the power of praying. He went to villages in India and taught them GEETA and explained them the power of this holy book. He had a different idea about changing the world. According to him, when we recite the verses from GEETA, sound energy is converted into some positive energy and starts accumulating around you or somewhere near you. When there is enough energy collected or converted, this energy starts affecting people and the society in a positive way. He did not know the exact time frame for such a thing to become a reality but he was laying seeds for tomorrow. He went to around 44,000 villages in Maharashtra state in India with this plan and doing the ground work.

His biggest assert was his health. He never had any disease. Even at the age of 92, he never walked with a support. His eye sight was good enough to recognize you from a long distance. His hearing ability was so could that he could understand while you whisper. He was allowed to eat anything he likes and wants. He used to do “YOGA” every morning and walk around 4 miles everyday. He used to read the entire news paper and mark some important columns for me.  Except computers, he was able to talk and teach me on any subject and any section. He had amass amount of information and knowledge with him which he unsuccessfully tried to pass to me. ( I was incompetent)

Everyone wants to imitate their fathers but I can proudly say that I don’t want to be like my father but wants to be like my grand father. He is a HERO for me. It doesn’t matter whether he was successful or not but what really matters is his NEVER SAY DIE attitude towards life. I wish to get that ability or attribute in legacy. I just wants to be like him. I just wish to be as active as he was in his life time……

Exist, Grow and Vanish…….

Last month was a difficult time for me as my role model passed away and I wasn’t blessed to have a final look. I wasn’t blessed to see how he was sleeping peacefully. I wasn’t blessed to know what he wanted to say and update him on what I think. People say that he was glowing while he was fast asleep and everyone around being shocked and shattered. I know that this is the punishment for my sins as this feeling of not having a final word will be with me till my last breath.

Now a void is created in my life. I am trying to fill up that void but all my trials have so far been unsuccessful. I always knew that he had answers to all my questions and I was always blessed by his experience and knowledge. But today, I am on my own to look for answers to my questions. I see no body around to help me to resolve the mystery of  life. I see no body to enlighten me with his experience and teach me things that books cannot teach us. Neither can I express my plight nor can I forget it. I just have to live with it. I think, this is life where you have to walk no matter how badly you are hurt. It is rightly said ” THE SHOW MUST GO ON”

No purpose No LIFE

I am writing after a long time. All these days were not busy but just couldn’t find a good topic to blog.  I thought of breaking the inactivity state and just writing some thing.

Today I am going to discuss a question whose answer is not known to majority of us. I always ponder to analyize my purpose in this life. I am not sure how many of you really believes in the concept of “having a purpose in life” but I sincerely believes in and try to find it. ( so far no luck… 😉 ). I am sure that I don’t want to just live a normal life without having any impact on any thing around me. I don’t want to relate my life or my self with a rock which just exist without even making any move.

I feel everyone is born with a purpose in life and every one should try to find it. Life doesn’t mean only to earn money but there are many different things associated with each individual’s life. There are so many things to explore, learn, understand and finally give it to others. I am being extremely philosophical but this is what I understand.

I am trying to articulate my feelings in words but it seems that my thougts are not yet developed to pen down properly….

(Will definitely update….)

Dark Tunnel…

This post is to describe my current status:

Lately, I am not working at all. I am not finding any interest in the work I am doing. I feel that something is continuously calling me but I am not able to find it. I feel that it’s my destiny that is calling me, the life that will make me happy and keep me on my toes. The kind of environment that will energize me and work as a medicine towards my laziness disease.

Lately, I have realised that till date, I have not done anything in my life. I don’t read a lot, I don’t know any musical instrument, I do watch movies, I am not very creative in my thoughts and the worst thing is I do not appreciate the good things around me.

I believe that to develop oneself, change is very important. One need to change everything to develop a different line of thought. Change can start from workplace, type of work, city, state, country, clothes, language, food habits and all other things. I am not sure how much we can change but I am pretty sure that it helps in developing new line of thoughts.

I some how believe that restless times are really good because there is a new beginning after this period. You continuously strive for finding a solutin and your analysis is so rigourously that you end up with a good solution. Though I can see the light at the other end of the tunnel but it is so difficult and painful to walk through the dark tunnel.

I just have to keep walking and I am not sure how long I have to walk for the better tomorrow.


Here I am, in between the crushing market and the diminishing opportunities in every single sector. With every passing day, trillions of dollars are wipped out of the market with crumbling stocks and lowering the chances of hope for better tomorrow. I know everyone is aware of this situation and scared for the consequences but I am here, enjoying every single day with no direct consequence of the “global” market to my life.

I am still the same guy looking out for the passion of my life. It has been the most difficult question of my life,”what is my passion?”. I am a software engineer and after spending thousands of dollars I concluded that programming is not my passion. Till date I confused myself with a programmer and a software engineer. For me, a programmer and a software engineer were one and the same but over a period of time, I understood the basic difference between them. As per my analysis, a programmer is a person who can write code in any programming language that is prevalent in the market while a software engineer is the person whose job is to build the system/application not through coding but through various software engineering practises. A programmer can be anyone and doesn’t have to have a degree but a software engineer has to have a degree to truly work as a software engineer.

I know the readers will not accept my definition and to help them understand we are going to play a game. I hope most of the readers must be working in a company. I also estimate that 50% of the readers are working in a software firm. So now the game is pretty simple, just evaluate the work you are doing in your company and make a list of stuff you need to know to do the work “effectively”. I expect that at least 50% of the reader will be surprised to know that the degree they have obtained doesn’t help them in doing their work effectively. The degree might have helped them to get the job but not helping in performing the duties at the job. I expect that as a doctor cannot perform its duties without the help of a degree, a software engineer cannot perform its duties without the degree. So, it can be said that at least 50% of the software engineers are just programmers and not even trying to be software engineer.It has taken some time for me to understand this difference so I don’t expect the readers to understand it so easily.

Over my last job, I was fortunate enough to listen to the top executives of a big company. Don’t worry, I am not going to describe everything but I am just going to talk about the ideas common to most of the orators.

“Try new things ”

This was one of the stuff shared by most of the orators. Their ideology was to get out of your comfort zone and try things which you have never tried before. You can apply this to everything, your food habits, your way of living, your job and even your hobbies. I am not sure how much that helps but you will definitely find some links that can help you in taking some decisions for a better future.

I will just switch to the most important one:::

The most important one that I want to concentrate is
“Find your passion”…!!!!!!!

This tag line can change your future. They are simple three words but extremely difficult task to perform. Most of us don’t even know what is the passion in life? and the worst is most of them don’t even try to find it because they live in the illusion of knowing their passion. Till date, I was of the same opinion but some events shattered by illusion. I am the person looking in every direction to find some help to know my passion. I can relate myself to Howard Roak ( I hope you must have read The Fountain Head, if not please do it.) I am in a position to say that I understand Howard. Its difficult to be happy if you are not working towards your passion and it’s useless to do any job and earn any amount if you are not passionate about the work you do. How can a person become successful if he is not passionate about his work?

Some of you may disagree with me as I am not considering other things in life. Hmmm…. other things…. what it can be? family, responsibilities may be private or social and etc.For e.g. you need money to keep your family self sufficient and if you are busy in finding your passion who is going to generate this money for you? So the best way to do is to “play a safe game”. Do something that you are not passionate about, earn money, feed your family with food and their needs and keep the cycle going and in the meanwhile find your passion. My argument to this is simple… it’s not possible…

Finding your passion is not like finding a full time job in which you need to prepare a resume and list things you know and give some interviews. Your passion could be anything maybe some times it does not have to deal with all the things that you have done before just because till date you played a safe game.

The only question that concerns me is Is it right to do a job which doesn’t excite you so that you fulfill all the responsibilities bestowed on you to stive util and unless you find the passion in your life? Should I still continue to play the safe game or should I start looking for passion in my life?

(will keep posted about my stance towards it….)